Having a strong support system around you is one of the most important
factors in living a healthy, fulfilling life, and this is especially important for young,
developing minds. Early friendships are our chance to learn and practice social
and communication skills, for instance, and having strong friendships helps
bolster kids’ self-esteem and their sense of belonging. Studies have found that
this sense of belonging plays a critical role in children’s quality of life and their
ability to cope with change.

But, as we all know, building and maintaining friendships isn’t always easy.
Even as adults, maintaining positive friendships can be challenging. In many
ways, building and maintaining friendships is a skill, and as adults, we can help
kids master this skill early on through an emphasis on social-emotional learning
(SEL) – in our homes, classrooms, and therapeutic offices.

Now, you might be wondering how SEL can help kids develop their
friendship skills. If so, keep reading! In this blog, we’ll explain how and why SEL
is a critical component of building friendship skills in young kids and setting them
up to have a life full of positive, uplifting connections.

Understanding Healthy Relationships

One of the first steps in building friendship skills in young kids is teaching
kids what healthy relationships look and feel like. In order to have healthy
friendships, we first need to know what ‘a healthy friendship’ means!

Relationships are confusing at any age, and for young kids, this is
especially the case. Young kids are learning how to make and maintain
friendships for the first time. It’s an exciting step, but also brings with it a fresh set
of challenges. Not every child is brought up seeing healthy relationships modeled
for them, nor is everyone taught the difference between healthy and unhealthy
relationships. For young kids, this can make the process of building and
maintaining friendships confusing. In fact, 70% of young adults express a desire
for more guidance on relationships from parents or health class.

SEL can help by teaching kids how to recognize the difference between
healthy and unhealthy relationships and friendships. For instance, here at
MindSparks Kids, we offer resources such as our “Healthy Relationships
Explained” video, as well as videos like, “What is Gaslighting?,” “What is Peer
Pressure?,” and “What is Consent?” These videos can be valuable tools in
helping kids understand what healthy relationships should look and feel like, and
can be adapted to suit different age groups.

Sometimes, kids might find themselves in harmful friendships or
relationships, but don’t have the skills or knowledge to recognize this. By using
SEL to teach kids about healthy relationships, kids can more easily recognize
and avoid unhealthy dynamics and when to seek support if needed. They can
also learn how to show up as a better friend themselves.

Identifying and Regulating Emotions

An important element of SEL is teaching kids how to understand and
regulate their feelings, which is vital to fostering healthy, supportive friendships.

When you’re unable to understand or effectively express how you’re
feeling, you might end up behaving in ways that aren’t conducive to healthy
friendships. You might lash out or isolate, for example, even if unintentionally.
We’re sure everyone reading this blog has experienced this at some point, and
while it’s only human, it can end up putting a strain on our close relationships.
This emphasizes the importance of honing our emotional awareness and
communication skills early on in life.

By teaching kids how to identify their emotions and express these
emotions healthily, kids can more easily maintain positive friendships. They can
vocalize how they’re feeling and what they need from others in a productive way,
as well as utilize healthy coping skills. All together, these skills help avoid conflict
and can foster a stronger sense of support within connections.

Developing Empathy

Empathy is also an important component of building and maintaining
healthy friendships. When kids develop the ability to understand how others

might be feeling, they’re able to act with more kindness and care and can show
up for their friends in the way they need. We want our kids and students to not
only have strong support around them, but to also be a strong support for others
– practicing empathy is the first step.

See, we might think of empathy as an innate skill, something we’re simply
born with. And while this might be true to an extent, it isn’t the complete story.
Empathy can, and should, be practiced.

For example, here at MindSparks Kids, we provide an Empathy worksheet,
which prompts kids to consider how others might feel in different situations, and
how they could show empathy and understanding in that moment. Resources like
this can help young kids practice the skill of empathy so it becomes easy and
instinctual. When kids practice asking questions about how others might be
feeling and how they can show support at a young age, they’ll continue this
pattern as they grow up, providing the foundation for lasting relationships.

Building Tolerance and Kindness

Here at MindSparks Kids, we also offer many resources to help facilitate
conversations around topics like disability, racism, fatphobia, and more.
Sometimes, parents or educators might feel intimidated by the idea of having
these conversations with young kids. It can be difficult to know how to approach
these topics in an age-appropriate way, for example, or we might find that our
own limited knowledge on a topic is a barrier to a productive discussion.

This is why our resources, like our videos and worksheets, can be so
helpful. Our videos and worksheets are carefully designed to be age-appropriate
and are filled with credible, valuable information and facts. This means you can
feel confident as you lead these conversations.

Having these conversations is so important in helping kids develop
tolerance and acceptance. By building these skills early on, we can set kids up
for success! Kids will become more open-minded, and will be better equipped to
make friends with people of varying backgrounds and abilities.

As you can see, social-emotional learning can do so much in helping kids
build the skills necessary to grow and maintain positive friendships. By
incorporating SEL into your home, classroom, or therapeutic office, you can help
lay the foundation for lasting friendships, ensuring kids will grow up feeling
supported and loved.

Try MindSpark Kids FREE for 7 days!

At MindSpark Kids, we help parents, caregivers, educators, and mental health professionals teach children how to develop necessary life skills. Why? Because socially and emotionally intelligent children grow up to be healthy, happy adults.

MindSpark Kids is an online membership with a database of social and emotional learning videos and worksheets to help children understand their emotions, make good decisions, and think critically.